How to Accept Yourself

Photo of Ria G. Rombaoa

By Avdhessh Arya


One of the most futile things you can ever do to yourself is to indulge in personality analysis- finding out what kind of person you are.

Let’s say you are an introvert.  That’s cool…that’s OK!

What’s wrong in being an introvert? And for that matter, what’s wrong in being an extrovert?


I have seen many of my introvert students trying too hard to turn themselves into extroverts, and vice versa.

It appears that nobody is happy with what he or she is.  People have been conditioned to believe that they are not good as they are. In order to prove that they are good, they need to get other’s approval, and for that, they need to polish themselves, refine themselves.

There’s nothing wrong in polishing and refining yourself as long as you feel good about it, and do it for yourself.  When you do it to please others, it becomes poisonous.

When you live by others’ standards, you lose your originality. You lose your ‘voice’. And if you really want to grow as an individual, you simply can’t afford that.



About the Author: Avdhessh Arya, is a personal development coach for youth and voice actor, who helps young people break walls of self-imposed limitations and become confident individuals. He is also the founder and owner of, a website portal with focus on dealing with lack of self-confidence, negativity, self-doubt, lack of focus and more. Visit to read more such insightful articles.


  1. Stuartart says:

    Bravo, well said. If we look for approval from others we will be like them. Let’s be like ourselves – individuals. Nice one. :)

  2. Michael says:

    I agree wholeheartedly that it doesn’t matter whether you are an introvert, extrovert, good-natured or anything else in between… My perception, however, is that the absolutely critical point is self-awareness. You must know who you are specific to core values, interests, aptitudes, prejudices and preferences, or you will find yourself largely unable to align your consequent behaviors with your ‘self’… Alignment is the key to inner peace, happiness and well-being. Alignment (or misalignment) creates the projected self to others, in turn creating others perception of us.

    Aside from self-awareness, I strive to live a life of authenticity… which without self-awareness is a futile exercise and goal. Be well!

  3. Chris says:

    I think we are conditioned to look for things that need to be changed instead of things which should be celebrated. Accepting ourselves, including flaws and strengths together, is one of the hardest things I think we can do. It is also one of the most important.

  4. Be your own self, I say….and strive to be the best You that you can be
    be good to yourself

  5. TKSoni says:

    Well said.

  6. Julian says:

    Too true, wonderful words and that is why I say “Just Be Unique as God created you to be and live a magical life!”

  7. R.G. Riles says:

    If we never feel comfortable in our own skin, we miss out on the fun that life has to offer. I would like to think that most of us eventually get to that space, where we know who we are and are accepting of that fact. If not, there must be more unhappy and unsettled people out there than I had ever imagined. Those poor folks rarely realize the potential within them, if only they’d let themselves be themselves!

  8. Buena says:

    Bravo :)

  9. Harold Millet says:

    He created us w/ uniqueness! We are different individuals!
    Mind you, you don’t want to be like somebody else, right? The challenge is that we only need to look for that thing that only us has it!
    Be proud of yourself!
    As the author said “There’s nothing wrong in polishing and refining yourself”. Nobody is perfect! We just have to do the right thing! ;D

  10. Ria Rombaoa says:

    We have all the right to be what we want to be but oftentimes the things and people around hinders us but as much as possible, we should not let them control us. We should exists in a way that we can be true to ourselves and in a way where we find joy….

  11. Jolyn says:

    I truly love this. I needed it today. Thank you so much for the message.


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