How to Create Your Own Perfect World

Photo of Randy Legaspi

By Avdhessh Arya

One of my friends used to say “Good guys never get girls”. It appears that pleasure is meant for ‘bad’ guys only. Can you see something in this statement? It is a belief and beliefs play a very important role in shaping our lives.

Good people suffer because they have been told centuries after centuries that it is their fate.

They are born to get exploited and suffer, that’s what makes them ‘good’.

They have been harboring this belief in their minds since the evolution of mankind. The belief is at work and they are getting the results – suffering, misery and pain.

 Whatever you are experiencing in your life is the result of your beliefs.

It all comes down to one thing – How you see the world? How do you relate to it?

In reality, there’s not one world. There are as many worlds as there are people.

 Every Person Lives in His or Her Own World. A World They Have Created for Themselves

Some people believe the world is full of love, they experience love.

Some people believe the world is full of crooks, they get to meet many crooks in a day.

Some people believe in wealth and prosperity, they experience the same.

Some people believe in misery and suffering, they suffer a lot.

An Example from My Life

The other day I went to an ATM to withdraw cash. As soon as I reached there, a guy rushed in front of me and entered the ATM chamber before me. It took him long since the ATM was slow.

I was getting uneasy and frustrated standing outside, wishing I could have made it before him. After that, the same instance started repeating, leaving me frustrated and confused.

Later, I realized that it was a belief taking shape in my mind that no matter how fast I try to make it, there will always be someone before me at the ATM and I’ll have to wait for long time. This instance might appear trivial but in reality it is not. It shows the power of belief.

If you are having trouble with your finances, love affair, married life, studies, career, personal growth or anything else, don’t look for reasons outside. There’s none. It’s all within you-your belief system. Check it and if you find something wrong, correct it.

How to Replace a Self-limiting Belief with a Self-supporting One

In the next couple of minutes, you are going to discover a simple yet powerful technique to replace any self-limiting belief with a self-supporting one.

Make sure you can spare 15-20 minutes alone. Get into a place where you know you will not be disturbed. Make yourself comfortable. Close your eyes. Take 3 deep breaths and start relaxing. Imagine that you are inhaling positive energy and exhaling all the stresses out. Take your time, go slow. When you feel relaxed, choose a word that represents an area from your life – self-esteem, studies, finances, career, family or whatever it happens to be.

For example if you choose finances, repeat ‘Finances’ in your mind and watch what kind of thoughts, images or feelings comes to you? Whatever comes to your mind, welcome it, even if it’s something you consider ‘bad’. This is your self-limiting belief making itself visible to you. Don’t try to suppress it.

Now, talk to it as if you are talking to one of your dearest friends. Say “I apologize for the fact that I never listened to you. I was busy finding answers on the outside, but today I have decided to have a word with you.  I now acknowledge that you DO exist.” Be present to whatever you may experience.  

Most of the self-limiting beliefs never leave us, the reason is, like human beings, they too, want to get acknowledged. They want to get their presence felt, but we never give them a chance.

We keep on denying their very presence. We pretend that no such belief exist in our mind.

Whenever we get even a glimpse of any such belief, we tend to dismiss it and start affirming something opposite, thinking that it will go away with time. That never happens. The more you suppress any belief, stronger it becomes.

If you feel under-confident, you deny that and keep repeating that you are confident.

If you are not making any progress in personal growth, you deny that and keep affirming ‘Everyday in every way I am getting better and better’

I am not suggesting that affirmations don’t work. They do. But you need to do the ground work first. What do you do when you want to plant some beautiful roses in your garden? Do you simply plant the roses or do you first clean the soil, remove the weeds and prepare it for your lovely roses? Of course you remove the weeds first.

Your mind, too, is like a garden. You need to eliminate the conflicting belief lying underneath FIRST. Accepting and acknowledging the self-limiting belief is the right way to clean your mind. Acknowledging the belief makes it loosen its grip on you. The energy that was stuck gets released and become available for you to form new, powerful self-supporting beliefs.

When you are done acknowledging the self limiting belief, ask yourself “Is this something I want or can I think of something better?” Repeat this question a couple times if you like and wait for the answer to come from within. If the answer doesn’t come instantly, open your eyes. Have faith that the answer will appear at the just the right time.

The answer will be the idea about the belief you need to install in your mind. Listen to your heart and install the new belief by affirming it daily. This is how you create your own PERFECT world.

Editor’s Note: Avdhessh Arya, is a personal development coach for youth and voice actor, who helps young people break walls of self-imposed limitations and become confident individuals. He is also the founder and owner of avdhessharya.com, a website portal with focus on dealing with lack of self-confidence, negativity, self-doubt, lack of focus and more. Visit http://avdhessharya.com to read more such insightful articles.

Comments

  1. Dear Avdhessh,
    I am a follower of A Course in Miracles and this is exactly what the course (and many other philosophies) recommends … don’t deny what’s deep, dark and negative – acknowledge it and let it rise to the surface for transformation. Well written.

    Kia ora
    Philip Bradbury

    • You are right Philip,
      Acknowledging the dark side of our personality is the right way to speed up the transformation process.
      Thanks for you comment, hope to see you around :)

  2. Reblogged this on The Daily Word, Food & The Vine and commented:
    This is just beautiful

  3. va02885 says:

    Great post! I use this with parking spaces. My friends ask why do you always get a good spot and II tell them because I expect one to be there…

    See it Believe it Conceive it Achieve it…

  4. Thank you for a wonderful and informative post. Jay

  5. Great post & timing. I stopped and did some listening and accepting. Interesting that I was already thinking about needing to listen and integrate all my inner voices this morning! You just gave me the perfect tool.
    Now, I may find inspiration to blog about this topic too.

    thank you, Brad

    • Hi Brad,
      Oftentimes, we get so lost in the outside world that we forget about the world inside us, and most of the answers are inside. You listened to your inner feelings and found out what you really need to do. That’s a good sign. Thanks for stopping by and taking time to comment :)

  6. rlagee says:

    I used to be frustrated by the “person ahead of me at the ATM” as well. I’ve turned it into a pleasure by always having a book on my iPhone. Now, I have an opportunity to catch up on the reading I never seem to have time to do! It doesn’t take much imagination to turn lemons into lemonade if you try.

  7. Jan Simson says:

    That was well said, Avdhessh. Nicely put.

  8. noir33 says:

    great post. I rarely comment on blogs but you are dead on. the more I live, the more I know that people are getting what they want. live true to yourself…get the best life has to offer….make excuses for yourself or people….expect the nightmare to never end. don’t let negative thought tell you nice people finish last….only miserable people feel that way.

  9. Not a bad idea at all. Quite an exercise though! The world in the mind often becomes reality. Good share!

  10. A healthy, inspiring post! I appreciate observations on how to stay calm when little frustrating things happen. And also, thanks for liking my blog. I’m glad to find yours.

  11. Really nice !*

  12. stickyquotes says:

    Awesome post!

  13. altruistico says:

    Wait for God’s Peace
    Colossians 3:15-17

    Many believers use a sense of peace as a sign for determining the will of God in their lives. However, this may not be enough evidence to verify that our decisions line up with the Lord’s plans. Whose peace are we experiencing? Sometimes our sense of tranquility can be attributed to our own satisfaction with the choice we have made.

    Today’s passage talks about letting “the peace of Christ rule in your hearts” (v. 15). This kind of settledness originates from Christ and is the umpire that judges whether your decisions fit with God’s will. The word peace means to be bound or woven together in harmony and oneness. So to have God’s peace about a matter means your decision must be aligned with His will. The only way to determine this is by comparing your thoughts and choices with His Word. Are you thinking the same way He does? Did you make your decision using scriptural principles or your own human understanding?

    One of the reasons we often make choices without the guidance of Scripture is because we want a quicker method for finding an answer. The Lord doesn’t just pour His thoughts into our brain without our cooperation. He molds us gradually, day by day, as we read the Word and let its truths sink into our mind.

    Building steadily over time is the only way to internalize a foundation of God’s truth. With His instructions as your basis, you can make decisions with confidence, knowing you are following His will. Then you’ll have a sense of oneness with the Lord, and His peace will guard your way.

    Another way of finding peace and changing the “fate” we believe we plague ourselves with.

    • Hi Atruistico,
      Yes, we need to make choices that are in alignment with divine will, but scriptures can just give hints about the right choice. You still need to look inside for answers right for you.

      Bible, Geeta, Koran or any other sacred book is a pointer to the fact that you can experience peace in life, not by following words written in them but by looking for the deeper meaning hidden in the words. And for that you need to listen to your heart because it is heart where the lord resides and not in the words, otherwise it would be like taking a signboard indicating way to church as church itself. Thanks for bringing this point up.:)

  14. Thank you for sharing that exercise. It is similar to Debbie Ford’s technique of talking to your “shadow self” and then listening to the answer. It will always shine light in the areas of your life that you have ignored or buried.

    Great blog entry!

  15. Hi Alpha,
    I would like to thank you for giving me an opportunity to contribute on AMS daily.
    Hope I shall be able to share what I have learned in my life with all the friends here on AMS daily.
    Thanks a lot! :)

  16. snagglewordz says:

    Great post… now to tend to my garden! Thank you for sharing. :)

  17. tksoni says:

    Good post.
    This post is helpful for each and everyone who sees the dark side of the World. It will help them to think positive.

    Tarun K Soni
    http://tksoni.wordpress.com
    http://tarunkumarsoni.wordpress.com

  18. Reblogged this on FilipinoFestival.com.

  19. Jordan says:

    Thank you! I enjoyed this a great deal! If I can figure out how to share it via my blog, I hope you don’t mind!

  20. eof737 says:

    Affirmations work but we must believe and act. Saying affirmations without conviction is like making promises you don’t intend to honor… :-) Great post!

  21. Jessie says:

    There is definitely something to be said for how your beliefs can shape you – even things you might not consider beliefs like, “There will always be someone at the ATM before me,” as opposed to, say, religious beliefs. I’ve had to do a lot of work to rewire my brain, and though it might sound silly, I’ve found a lot of help in “I am” statements. Before I go to bed, I say a list of what I AM, even as opposed to what I want to be. (Not written, just things that come into my head.) I am smart, I am pretty, I am thoughtful… etc. I totally believe you can reprogram yourself to have new beliefs, and my increasing confidence is proof!

  22. AMSDaily says:

    Thank you very much for reblogging this!

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