To the Black Swan
Photo of Shem-shem Pablo
By Alpha (Day 103)
I know how you are feeling right now – rotten as a dirty old dung. You feel sick, unattended, mismanaged and probably neglected. Even if you are represented by your lawyer or another authoritative figure, I understand you feel like you are being used. You also feel that everything is dictated because you think the system is playing against you, not for you!
I’m sorry to say that you feel that way. I know you can not do much – or anything at all! Your hands are tied and you wish you wear your own words on your sleeves. But you don’t or you think you can’t.
I know why you feel that way most of the time these days. You wish you were someone else! You also hope that you disappear from all your friends. Yet – despite the attempts, you seem to fail. You still bring yourself up to think and doubt of who you really are. In fact, you seem to not know who you truly are. You are lost, or so you think.
At times I wanted to ask you: how can you get out of this mess? How do you think you can create your future away from the advice of the people around you? When can you learn to just stand up and speak your words out of your mouth, instead of following somebody else’s command?
But, oftentimes I don’t want to ask you any of the questions – because I understand why you are, the way you act.
I can really understand why you act this way. You didn’t choose to be where you are or whom you can rest your exhausted body at night. But because you really didn’t have any choice, you just let them do the legwork for you.
When I look at your eyes and see the sadness in them, I feel for you! You are very young to be misguided or not guided at all! You need somebody to help you carve your own future. You need somebody other than yourself or your alter ego to show you a better way.
But who can you turn to?
My dear, I feel for you. I know you know that, too!
I want you to know that I empathize with you and your situation. Individuals like you break my heart all the time!
You know I got your back – but you have to learn how to put your back on people like me, as well!
You need to learn how to trust and let the magic of it rule you.
You need to learn that!